Helena "Tidge" Wetzel Roller
December 23, 2025: "Tidge” Wetzel Roller, 85, died this morning at home, surrounded by loved ones. Tidge was brilliant, funny, impulsive, and had a clear vision of how things should be done. She was a catalyst for change in so many ways.
Tidge grew up on the Main Line in Wayne, Pennsylvania with her brother Clayton “Tony” in the rambling Victorian her grandfather built. She had dear friends and deep friendships. She spent Martha's Vineyard summers riding and sailing and a formative year studying in West Berlin. She went on to Randolph-Macon Woman’s College, where she met a handsome UVA boy on a blind date in the Main Hall date parlor—the very room where I would take calculus years later. Her own mother died while Tidge was at Randolph-Macon, and she gained a stepmother she'd already known her whole life– her mother's best friend, the recently-widowed wife of her father’s best friend. I am named for that stepmother.
Tidge's life was capacious and improbable: she was an Anglican missionary in rural northern Canada; a graduate student at Catholic University; she taught English to two of President Johnson’s daughters and traded stories with the Secret Service agents in the teachers’ lounge. She spoke several languages and read every single thing she could get her hands on. She married that UVA boy and followed him to England, teaching while he did his graduate work in theological architecture. They roamed Europe in a VW camper van photographing cathedrals, then sailed home with their best-ever accident: a surprise newborn (my sister Helena “Lennie”), along with the two miserably seasick black cats they couldn’t bear to leave behind.
Together, Tidge and Doug built the Tree House where they raised children—including us surprise twins: Eric and Katie—they taught us to roller skate on the roof, hosted endless play readings and parties, and acted, directed, and produced countless local theater productions.
Tidge made elaborate costumes for every imaginable occasion, sang and danced beautifully (and played violin less beautifully), welcomed foster children and foreign students, took in countless elderly or infirm relatives and friends and refugees, made sure there was always an extra place at the table for “strays”-- Preissy always knew to make extra. Tidge taught high school and college and Sunday school. She eventually ran university bookstores for a few decades while remaining deeply rooted in the Staunton community. She served on the vestry and various boards, worked with Doug to protect historic buildings in Staunton, and threw her heart and resources into every good cause, especially at Emmanuel Episcopal Church and Oak Grove Theatre. I am suddenly devastated that I'll never get to see my parents dance together again.
Just over a year ago, our family entered a season of sudden loss. We lost Rob's mom Alice (who also lived with us) from a stroke which happened the very same morning that Tidge collapsed in a crosswalk. They ended up in adjoining hospital rooms. We had another couple of weeks with Alice and another year with Tidge.
Mom had a small stroke recently and her health declined very suddenly. Last week, I unknowingly brought home Flu A from the public preschool where I teach. Most of my team had it, too. Mom did not survive it.
We are heartbroken, but profoundly grateful. She stayed peacefully in her own bed right up until the end– here in her own home, the stepless guesthouse Dad designed and Rob built for the sole purpose of helping them age in place. Eric flew in yesterday from Minnesota to join me and Lennie. Rob has tried to hold everything together for the teenagers we are fostering. (Holidays are already hard enough for young people who have known too much loss.) Many of the grandchildren were able to make it here. Others are with us in spirit.
Tidge lived a vast, funny, generous, fiercely engaged life. In the end, she donated her body to the Virginia State Anatomical Program so she could keep on teaching and giving (and being center stage) even in death. She hoped to inspire medical professionals like the ones who helped her so much in life, Doctors Chernoff and Bouldo and Daracott. When Tidge finishes medical school, her ashes will go to the Columbarium at Emmanuel Episcopal Church. What a brilliant, funny, complicated, giving person. She will be sorely missed. We will hold a memorial service at Emmanuel later this winter.
In Tidge's memory, do something to make things better: volunteer your time or money to a good cause, pick up trash on your morning walk, foster a child or teenager, read a great book, or find someone who could use a hand and go out of your way to help.
-Katie Roller Schulz-Ditchen
Fishersville, Virginia
Helena "Tidge" Wetzel Roller's Celebration of Life will be held February 14th, 2026 at
Emmanuel Episcopal Church
300 W Frederick St
Staunton, VA 24401
Meet and Greet in Memorial Hall 1:00
Service in Sanctuary 2:00
Tidge requested donations to the church or to other "helpers" in lieu of flowers.
If you'd like to reach Douglas Roller, he is at home:
104 Caldwell Lane, Fishersville Virginia 22939.
Coffman Funeral Home and Crematory, 230 Frontier Drive in Staunton is in charge of her arrangements.
Condolences may be expressed to the family online at www.coffmanfuneralhome.net
